First, my buddy and I were in the habit of "borrowing" his dad's and mine .22 revolvers to go rat hunting in a couple of tumble down buildings near our very rural homes. I decided I was going to take my father's .22 Colt Ace on one trip.
My parents were away, there was no neighbor near enough to see into the third floor attic, but I snuck around like people could see me. I got the key to the gun box and opened the lid just enough to feel around and find the Ace, and then I groped around enough to find a mag that fit and shoved it home and hid everything under my shirt until I met my bid and we set off through the fields. Paranoia!!!
When we arrived, we flipped for who got to shoot first and who would hold the light and I won. We got down in the basement and positioned ourselves where we would have a good view and settled down to wait for the rats to start making noise.
When the first rat came out, my bud lit it up and I took careful aim and fired - THE .45!!!!! - ouch
We ran like scared rabbits. Many years later we came to realize that nobody was likely to have heard the shot, but considering how loud it was where we were, we thought we had woke up the world.
I carefully cleaned up the gun and put it away feeling very foolish and never went rat hunting again.
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Some years later, and the same buddy, I was sitting on a stone wall near where we were deer hunting (with shotguns) waiting for him to come out of the woods. He had seen me sitting there and decided it would be fun to try to sneak up on me.
It was a nice sunny fall afternoon and I was kind of dozing and not paying much attention to my surroundings when my bud popped out of the woods behind me and hollered "BOO" whereupon I fell backwards off the wall and dropped my shotgun. I caught my gun in midair, and both it and I fell, and somehow managed to get my gloved hand into the trigger guard and when I hit the ground it discharged stright up into the air.
I was sure the safety had been on and upon disassembly we found that I had broken the safety off with the combined force of hitting the ground and my gloved fingers in the trigger guard, allowing the gun to fire. I have since made it a rule to NEVER depend on a safety for safety. I have even seen a 1911 fire when it was on safe.
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After the end of an IDPA stage I cleared my gun and popped the mag back in and dropped the slide and pulled the trigger at the berm, which really added a lot of time to that stage.
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Anybody can have brain farts.