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She has TOLD you to get a new gun, right?

At least I'm glad to hear that you aren't arguing at this point. So make it the best dang gun you can! I mean, sure - you could get a Ruger with a manual safety. And they are great guns (I have one), but I gotta say it wouldn't be my first choice for a CCW pistol. My top choices in a situation like this would be:

1) 1911 - hey, there are a ton of holsters and other after market options out there and you could get it in just about any caliber you want.
2) CZ - pick -75 for 9mm and .40S&W or -97 for .45ACP. Great guns, but accessories are a bit tougher to find. Especially for the 97.
3) H&K - hey, she told you to get a new gun, right?
4) SA XD - that grip safety counts, right?