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longtooth wrote:excellent, Excellent, EXCELLENT. With your permission I would like to use this when I teach my awareness & verbal assertiveness class.
I commend you highly.

Thanks, and yes you can share it!

She thinks that it would not happen to us.

Is she reading this thread? It CAN HAPPEN to you, to her, to a friend or family member. Unless she blocks the doors and windows and never goes back outside again.

You mentioned before she said she could take care of herself. She will never REALLY know that -- until unfortunately the time comes to test that theory.

Tell her to read my story:
A few years ago, I worked out several days a week at the gym with heavy weights, cardio the whole nine yards. I was in my peak physical condition and I was strong, independent and didn't need anyone to "take care of me". Ha. I learned a hard lesson. One night I was robbed in my FRONT YARD. Thankfully the guy just wanted my wallet, but it could have been so much worse. Talk about a blow! IN MY YARD - which is an extension of MY HOUSE - where I'm supposed to have BOUNDARIES< where I'm supposed to be SAFE!!! Hmph.

The part that was the most humiliating to me was during the assault, I was paralysed with fear. I could NOT DO ANYTHING. I FROZE UP COMPLETELY.

There I was STRONG and physically fit -- but mentally I was not prepared. You talk about a blow to my ego. All of the sudden I was a victim. That was so depressing. Realizing how vulnerable I really was. Realizing how STUPID I really was. And how lucky I was, it could have been so much worse.

Then, my real FEAR became -- what if it happened again, what if it was worse? what if I froze up again?

It took a while for me to get over my personal humiliation and I lived with that fear as a constant nag. Finally last year I took a self defense course, which was the first step in moving forward with the idea of trying to heal my wounded self esteem.

One point that brought it home for me in the self defense class. Women, in general -- are less likely to consider protecting themselves. BUT, if it is a loved one who is in harm's way - she would give her life (almost instinctively). One thing a woman needs to remember is that IN PROTECTING HERSELF, she is also protecting the lives of her children and loved ones. If she is hurt or killed, her children will suffer - for her loss and pain. That put it in a whole different perspective for me.

I know it's a minor victory - but my husband posted a while back about me confronting a panhandler at a gas station. http://www.texasshooting.com/TexasCHL_F ... ght=#87205. I realized, I was more mentally prepared to face confrontation - and although it was just a verbal altercation, I WAS PREPARED.

It's a funny story, but it was a turning point in my psyche. Before I was worried -- what good would carrying a handgun be if I just froze up again? It was almost then and there that I realized, I could carry a handgun and I would be prepared to use it if I needed to. I wouldn't freeze up again. The mental block was broken!

All that to say this:
There is a lot for women to "unlearn" about society's norms and expectations of what a "girl" or "lady" -- should and shouldn't do. We our teach girls to be polite and we teach them to be victims.

We don't live in a world of "what if" anymore -- we live in a world of "what IS" happening. She needs to be prepared.