Awhile back I fired off an email to some woman up in the yankeeland headquarters for the great Taco Cabana. Now why a Texas based chain selling Mexican (TexMex) food, is headquartered near Canada is without a doubt the most challenging logistical question to date, but I digress. A few months ago, it was made public that 30.06 signs would be posted in all Taco Cabana's throughout Texas. As every church-going member of this forum knows, we don't go to Taco Cabana in the daytime! We stumble in at 3am begging for breakfast tacos and 44 oz cups for water! That was a joke, but in all seriousness, it is open 24 hours, and as common sense and statistics both dictate, not to mention my own parent's voices chiming in my head, nothing good ever happens past midnight. I got very preturbed and irritated, as a lot of fellas did, and let Mrs. Buttafucco or whomever she was, know just how I felt about her company deciding that they have the authority to put an asterisk next to the 2nd Ammendment. I got the standard form-generated response. "Blah blah blah blah, safety of our customers, blah blah blah". I argued vehmenently, going back and forth for now, MONTHS with this woman and all of her cronies in the Taco Cabana parent company's legal department. I FINALLY found the saving grace from my self-inflicted boycott of the holy grail of late night dining when I received an ACTUAL PHONE CALL from the President of the company himself. My months and months of intelligent bickering, pandering, and communist accusationing came to fruition when the man asked me simply:
"Mr. Sanford, are you aware of the regulations and requirements of the 30.06 sign and how it must be displayed?"
"Yes sir, I think so." I replied.
"Well, then you are AWARE that the letters must be 1 inch high and the sign blah blah x blah blah high/wide?"
"Yes sir." I replied sheepishly.
"Then have you SEEN the 30.06 signs that we have displayed in the storefronts?"
"I guess not, I've been boycotting."
"Well let's just say that there is an "accidental" issue with the size of the signs, catch my drift?"
"I'm starting to...and I'm starting to like you more and more and am regretting foregoing TC for so long!"
"Well let's just say that this was a way to play both sides of the issue. We get the complainers and Brady advocates off of our backs because we took a proactive approach, yet we know full well the regulations requiring that sign to be enforced and valid."
I apologized to the man, and proceeded to speak with him for the next 20 minutes about the pro's and con's of carrying a mouse gun for personal protection. See ya guys later, I've got a date with a fat chick....en burrito!