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Sorry in advance for the thread high jack (but I didn't start it). I completely agree with the give it time comment. I just wanted to add that IMHO most men (myself included) cannot fully comprehend the mother-daughter relationship, and further, how that relationship changes when the daughter becomes a wife.

Our eldest daughter married a fine young man (an officer and a gentleman) that my wife absolutely adored when they first met and first started dating. In fact, I even remarked that I thought maybe my wife was going to dump me and try to go after the guy herself back then. But, when it came to the point that this fine young man married my wife's little girl (who was 22 and a college graduate) and took her away - well, that's a different story! The logic that my wife and I were 22 and we had only known each other less than a year when we married 27 years ago didn't seem to matter - somehow all that was irrelevant when applied to our little girl.

Our daughter and son-in-law have been apparently happily married for almost three years now. I would say things between my wife and our son-in-law are tolerant but still sometimes strained. It seems at least some of the pressure now is coming from some need for my wife to be a grandmother....

As far as the tactical situation goes, I'd say you acted responsibly and having good communication methods worked out in advance is what's required. Every situation provides a learning opportunity and a chance to improve.