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My experience this summer was related to this topic. I needed a smaller gun than my G19. Online I researched several 380s and finally thought I'd just love the Ruger LCP. I went to the range for a couple hours and tried several different types of small 9mm and 380s. I found that I actually didn't like the Ruger at all. My issue was that it was just too darn small to get a good grip and I had some issues getting it back on target quickly or really even hitting a solid enough group that I was pleased with. I did find happiness with the Sig P238 which ended up being the right size, weight, and caliber for me. I'm sure if they had a 9mm in the same size gun I'd have tied that too however I feel the gun is in perfect balance in the 380 so the 9mm might just the that little extra too much snap like the LCP was to me.

For me it's the total package which makes the gun good for someone. The size, weight, and caliber vs hand size, carry method, stopping power, and recoil all are weighed and hopefully a good carry gun which is used comfortably and often at the range is found.