I can't add a lot, guns are like shoes, what fits me may not fit you.
1) I'd go to stores, hold a lot, see what fits your hand
2) Try the several at the range
3) realize that what ammo you use will affect your perception of "recoil"
Google with the quotes ...... Amarillo "gun rentals"
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Explanation of "3) realize that what ammo you use will affect your perception of "recoil""
If recoil is a problem at all, (for some it is, some it isn't)
I tried a 10mm with full power ammo once, fired it twice, it hurt, later they made low recoil ammo,...)
Generally, these 3 "variables" affect your second/followup sight picture acquisition time, and felt recoil
A) Heavier bullets and B) "hotter" +P rounds in C) lighter weight guns will mean more felt or perceived recoil.
A) Lighter bullets and B) "slower/regular" rounds in C) heavier weight guns will mean LESS felt or perceived recoil.
A .40 in a full-sized pistol is manageable for me, but in the small pistols there's less area of my hand behind the grip so it "feels" snappier
I carry a fat subcompact 9mm, it actually has less "felt" recoil than some of the thin .380s I retired to storage.
Also, you will find that you are much more accurate with some than others, your hand will like certain "grip angles" better than others,
Also, the "right" gun, and carry options for you, will depend on what clothing styles you wear, and I, (and many others) changed clothing styles to meet the needs of my carrying (hint: shopping trip
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