Thanks for your service.
Edited to add: Here are his comments:
sodbuster95 wrote:Whoa...for a second there, I thought you were mad at me!
Seriously, though, I do have an interest and, to be frank, it's more than a passing one.
My first suggestion to him would be to seek and get treatment. That is first and foremost and far and away more important than anything else. Including his 2nd Amendment rights. Some people can deal with it on their own; most cannot. Left untreated and unaddressed, it will spiral out of control. That's not a "may" or a "could" - that's a "will." If he's one of the lucky few that can just "suck it up and drive on," good for him. That's pretty unlikely, though. More to the point, no one should have to even try to just "suck it up." It's a condition that merits treatment. A good soldier (Marine) recognizes when he needs the tools and training to accomplish a mission. This is no different.
Having said that - and with utter frankness - I simply cannot and would not direct anyone to seek treatment from the VA. First, there are important considerations about privacy of records and such. I wish that were not so, but it is. Second, though, is that while many of those who work for the VA care and do their best, the VA simply cannot respond appropriately in most instances. I have heard story after story from vets who were utterly let down by the VA. Again, I wish that were not so, but (I feel that) it is.
If there's a veteran's support group available, try that. There are lots of resources to seek them out (IAVA, Wounded Warriors, Hidden Wounds, etc.). If that's not an option, try a private therapist or doctor who is both willing and able to address service-connected issues. Some cannot, others simply won't, still others - like a psychiatrist I went to for a while - refuse to acknowledge it and so it becomes the "elephant" in the room. By whatever method, though, seek and get treatment.
It is important for a veteran in his position to remember that he is not alone. It may (and does) seem like it, but he is not. I lived with it for a long time before I finally realized what was going on. Fortunately for me, I have gotten to a point where it's controlled (I don't think it ever goes away.) The "turning point" for me came one night when I was out and an old Vietnam vet whom I had never met and whom I did not know literally pulled me out of a crowd and told me - in no uncertain terms - what was going on. It's difficult to explain exactly how that worked, but he saw it, recognized it, and helped me deal with it.
Finally, I would suggest to him that he make a conscious decision now that, NO MATTER WHAT - no matter how angry he is, no matter what the situation is - he will walk away. He has to make that decision to and for himself. No one else can do that for him. When it gets bad - walk away. It's not his wife or his baby he's angry at, so don't react to them. Just WALK AWAY. Go for a run, hit the gym, hide in a bush in the dark for a while, do whatever you have to do to get out of the situation and calm down. However, I would strongly suggest that getting out of the situation not involve alcohol. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a teetotaler (at ALL), but that is not the time to throw back a few beers. Doing so will just make things worse. Trust me, I know.
Then, if he hasn't already, seek and get treatment. There's no reg that says you must do it on your own. You wouldn't attack the enemy alone, why would you attack this alone? I will not make the suggestion that he get rid of any guns he has. Two reasons; One, he won't want to and, two, I wouldn't do it, either. But he *must* make the decision to walk away. I cannot stress how important that is. Frequently, the "anger" comes not from the situation itself, but a perception that you must control the situation and the realization that you cannot. But the greatest control you have is to simply not be in the situation. It can be very liberating to realize how easy it is to "control" a situation by removing yourself from it. That doesn't mean you must ignore it; it simply means that you get to decide when and how you address it.
On a side note, one thing I've really started paying attention to recently are so-called PTSD "service" dogs. These are not the same as the ADA dogs people are used to, but are trained to respond to vets who are dealing with these issues. They provide companionship and a trusting relationship (sounds odd, I know, but it is what it is) and are frequently trained to place themselves between the vet and disturbing situations or to sense and respond in a comforting manner to a vet who's experiencing stressful issues. For example, I know one group that trains them to position themselves physically against the vet and between approaching people in a non-aggressive manner, tail-wagging manner, but as an obstacle nonetheless. They are not all trained the same way and there is no certifying agency (that I'm aware of), but it's an option worth looking into.
Of course, above all else - seek and get treatment.