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I am glad your wife survived her experience with nothing worse than a better understanding of situational awareness and operational preparedness.

Your wife definitely needs to choose her own weapon -- one that she is comfortable working. Regarding cartridges, it has been said that you should carry the largest that you can shoot effectively. If that is a .380, so be it. Better still if it is 9x19 or larger. If she has small hands and is considering self-loaders, ones with single stack magazines are probably a good idea since they are less girthy. If you are lucky, she'll find something in a store that you can find an example of to rent or borrow to try shooting. Just because it feels good when holding doesn't mean it'll be pleasant when things are more dynamic.

Best of luck in your search. Because my wife has guns she enjoys shooting, she is a great shooting pal for me. I hope you end up similarly blessed.