Page 1 of 1

Something to Brighten your Thursday!!

Posted: Thu Apr 20, 2006 8:49 am
by dpatterson
Are you a Democrat, Republican or a Redneck ?

Here is a little test that will help you decide. The answer can be found by posing the following situation and question:

      You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you. You are carrying a Glock cal 40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.

What do you do?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Democrat's Answer:

      Well, that's not enough information to answer the question! Does the man look poor! Or oppressed? Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack? Could we run away? What does my wife think? What about the kids? Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand? What does the law say about this situation? Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children? Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me? Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me? If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me? Should I call 9-1-1? Why is this street so deserted? We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior. This is all so confusing! I need to discuss with some friends over a latte and try to come to a consensus.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

      Republican's Answer:

      BANG!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


      Redneck's Answer:

      BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click.... Click....

      (sounds of reloading).

      BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click ...

      Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Ranger T-Series Hollow Points or the Ranger Bonded Hollow Points?"

      Son: "You got him Pop! Can I shoot the next one?"

      Wife: "You are not taking that to the Taxidermist!"

Posted: Thu Apr 20, 2006 9:30 am
by Diode
LMAO... very good! Very good indeed! <sniff>

Taking artistic liberty with this one...

Posted: Thu Apr 20, 2006 10:12 am
by HighVelocity
You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, a DEA agent with dreadlocks comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, starts insisting he is the only one professional enough to handle your Glock Fotay, and tries to grab your gun. You have mere seconds before the video reaches the internet.

What do you do?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Democrat's Answer:

      What are you talking about? I don't carry a gun, it might jump out of the holster and hurt somebody.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

      Republican's Answer:

     Plausible Denial

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


      Redneck's Answer:

      I'd tell him it was empty, hand it to him and find cover.

Re: Taking artistic liberty with this one...

Posted: Thu Apr 20, 2006 10:25 am
by gigag04
HighVelocity wrote: Redneck's Answer:

I'd tell him it was empty, hand it to him and find cover.
Now THAT is hilarious.

Re: Taking artistic liberty with this one...

Posted: Thu Apr 20, 2006 11:13 am
by Kalrog
HighVelocity wrote:I'd tell him it was empty, hand it to him and find cover.
And pull my BUG just in case he points the muzzle in my direction - even if his body is between it and me.

Posted: Thu Apr 20, 2006 11:15 am
by Kalrog
Oh, and HV. I gotta steal this and post it on another forum. :lol:

Posted: Thu Apr 20, 2006 12:39 pm
by longtooth
Redneck with a CAPITAL R, & wear the label prowdly. :lol:

Posted: Thu Apr 20, 2006 1:13 pm
by dpatterson
LT.... I am shooting Saturday... come St. Peter or High Water. Well Maybe not St. Peter... Maybe there is a range in the sky!

Went Monday with the boss... thats a good way to relieve some stress... We just wished that we could take some of these computer systems out there to "watch" us shoot.... : )

DP

Re: Taking artistic liberty with this one...

Posted: Thu Apr 20, 2006 1:21 pm
by stevie_d_64
HighVelocity wrote:You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, a DEA agent with dreadlocks comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, starts insisting he is the only one professional enough to handle your Glock Fotay, and tries to grab your gun. You have mere seconds before the video reaches the internet.

What do you do?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Democrat's Answer:

      What are you talking about? I don't carry a gun, it might jump out of the holster and hurt somebody.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

      Republican's Answer:

     Plausible Denial

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


      Redneck's Answer:

      I'd tell him it was empty, hand it to him and find cover.

:smilelol5: :smilelol5: :smilelol5: :woohoo :rolll

Posted: Thu Apr 20, 2006 3:21 pm
by longtooth
DPaterson, I will ber there too. We did miss you last Sat.

Posted: Thu Apr 20, 2006 4:10 pm
by dpatterson
Yeah... We went home for Easter.... It was a nice visit... But I really need to shoot at something afterwards.... I can only take some much of bonding with so many people...

Sometimes I think I could live in the mountains by myself... I would have to take my little boy.... He sure is fun to have around...

DP

Posted: Fri Apr 21, 2006 12:55 am
by JLinTX
THat was great! Thx - +1

Posted: Fri Apr 21, 2006 4:35 am
by longtooth
Yes, I suspect there are a lot of us on this board that were born 100 yrs too late. (My Father-in-law about me, not original)