I am sorry to say I had my first code Red!

[CC Italian]

I don't know where to start. My girlfriend and I are still shaken up. This only happened an hour ago. Anyways, my girlfriend went to get new tires at Discount Tire. I was following her in my car and as we pulled into the parking lot a man seemed to get upset because he was going to back into a parking spot that my girlfriend took. I was right behind her and he pulled forward about two truck lengths to back his car into the spot. The problem was she was already in the spot before he even decided to stop and put it in reverse. So really he had no reason to even get upset.

Ok, so my girlfriend and I get out of our cars and this guy starts to yell at her while backing into another spot 3 down the lane "I almost hit you". At first we didn't realize he was talking to us but then he yelled it again. We gave each other that look that you give your significant other when you can tell someone is a little crazy and said nothing nor did we look at the man and walked inside to the discount tire.

We get inside and the place is full of about twenty people (women and small children also). We are waiting in line to talk to an employee with about 7 other people and I see the guy come in the door. I said "oh great here we go" he had that look on his face that he was going to start a fight over a parking place. He comes bursting in the door and immediately yells at my girlfriend and gets no more then 2 feet from her and yells "I almost hit you". Once again I clearly noticed him saying "I almost hit you", ok so you didn't hit her is what pops into my mind and back away from my girlfriend immediately. Those where my exact words! This man was 6 foot 4in - 6 foot 7in and weighed over 300 pounds even though he was 20 years my senior. I immediately went to color RED!

Now everybody in the store and engine bay (this guy was that loud that the guys could hear him from outside with their air wrenches going) is looking at us and what is going on. I remained calm as he shifted his attention to me. He stood about 4 feet from me and my girlfriend who was now behind me. He stood over me (I am only 5 foot 8in) and started yelling "I am not even talking to you". I then told him to step back out of my personal space because we felt threatened. He then starting yelling again and inched forward a bit. I then gave a verbal command to stop and raised my left hand while having my right hand very close to my iwb holster and changed my stance. At this point he looked down and eyed my pocket knife that was clipped to my pocket and I think he thought I was ready to use it. He must have thought a 4 eyes like me would never carry a gun because he backed up a little and then continued to yell. The management then asked him to leave and then he looked around and realized he had made a big mistake. He then said how long is the wait. The employee looked at him and paused. Then said 45-60 minutes and started to tell him to leave again but the man said he couldn't wait that long and he would come back later.

He stormed out and didn't come back! A little girl started crying and everybody in the store was shaken up and the manager watched him leave and said he was going to call the cops if he didn't leave immediately. He left and that was the end of it. I give all this detail but it only lasted about 10-15 seconds. All of this over a parking spot! After everybody calmed down one man said to me "your lucky he didn't have a gun and shoot you". I immediately thought about the situation and thought about what went right and wrong and how the one thing I did do right was observe his body language the whole time. I can clearly say that if the manager did not ask him to leave he would have kept yelling and I think that snapped him out of his rage. I also think if the manager said nothing that more then likely it would have escalated and my girlfriend or myself would have been assaulted and I would of had to draw my weapon to protect us because this man was clearly much stronger then me and would have easily hurt me very badly and probably kill my girlfriend if he punched her. She is only 4 foot 10 in!

Carry all the time guys!

[pcgizzmo]

People are idiots. Over a parking spot. T'hat's crazy.

[paulhailes]

Sounds like that guy was having a bad day and thought he could take it out on the people around him. He better watch out some of us punching bags punch back.

[Middle Age Russ]

Some people seem to just go off over the silliest things these days. Good point to always be prepared so you can act when you need to rather than prepare -- or worse.

[gigag04]

I had a guy that was willing to die over right of way in the parking lot of Golds Gym. My cooler head prevailed but I had half the mind to have him hooked up for DOC language.

[Ed4032]

You probably should have call the police anyway. This may not be over.

[texanron]

This encounter reflects just how fast things can go south and over the simplest of things. Thanks for sharing.

[RSJ]

Sounds like it went about as well as those things can go. Only thing I would have done differently would be to call the police (stating non-emergency) and file a report, that way if you ever run into the SOB again and *God, forbid* something happened, you'd have a potentially better piece of evidence.

[clarionite]

I agree that it might have been a good idea to call the cops, just to have the incident on file if the guy was waiting for you later in the day.

One thing that the OP said gives me something to think about though...

I'm 6'7" and 300+lbs. I'm by no means a small guy. I've read several posts that mention disparity in size as a factor in making the decision to go to code red.

My size has worked for me in the past, where people have decided to leave me alone because of my size. As a teen it worked against me because it was a way to make a name for some punk... they fought the biggest guy around. I'm beginning to wonder if my size will work against me if I'm ever in a situation to have to defend myself in court because I needed to use deadly force.

[rubiconjp]

Thanks for sharing. As far as size, I think it might be a factor for the jury, if it comes to that. At least that's what I have read.

Though if in that situation, with the man clearly agitated that it was his spot, I would have told him that I did not realize that, and am willing to swap the spaces with him.

[CC Italian]

Yea, I thought about calling the cops. Probably should have but I also think that he thought my girlfriend and I were separate. The way he said "I am not talking to you". I think it didn't register with him even after I told him to step away from my "girlfriend" that we were together until a few seconds after I told him to step back or even until he left. He was in a rage! As for his size he was huge! I didn't notice until he came in but he would be one of those guys you see on cops where 4 or 5 cops were needed to try and handcuff him. My girlfriend could barely see his eyes when he was yelling from that close of a distance being that he was so tall. If someone that big grabbed me or my girlfriend I would have no choice but to draw my weapon. I don't think I could have hurt him very easily in a fist fight even if he was slow and fat. I am not a wimp for my size but I know when I am out of my weight class.

[CC Italian]

He had to be double my weight easily!

[Rex B]

When it's 100 degrees outside, keep in mind a lot of people are running around without A/C.
Hot people have a short fuse.
Remember that also when you see another driver sailing through traffic. He/she may just be trying to keep moving to keep the air flowing. I don't have much tolerance for rude drivers, but in summer heat, if they have the windows down I give them some extra slack, or the right-of-way.

[The Annoyed Man]

I agree that it might have been a good idea to call the cops, just to have the incident on file if the guy was waiting for you later in the day.

One thing that the OP said gives me something to think about though...

I'm 6'7" and 300+lbs. I'm by no means a small guy. I've read several posts that mention disparity in size as a factor in making the decision to go to code red.

My size has worked for me in the past, where people have decided to leave me alone because of my size. As a teen it worked against me because it was a way to make a name for some punk... they fought the biggest guy around. I'm beginning to wonder if my size will work against me if I'm ever in a situation to have to defend myself in court because I needed to use deadly force.

Size is like any other thing, it can work for or against you, according to how you use it. I've known several guys your size. One of my friends is a former middle linebacker for the San Diego Chargers. His younger brother was an All American center at Northern Arizona State. Another friend is a former defensive end for the New England Patriots. They have all experienced what you said—an idiot starting something with them because they were huge and the other guy was trying to impress everyone with how "badass" he was. But also, my friends all have pretty mellow personalities, and most people see them as big gentle teddy bears. In fact, lots of people feel very safe around them, because these are all guys who know now to restrain themselves, but who also know how to unleash hades on anyone who wants to make life hard on them or their loved ones. You've never really had your butt handed to you until it gets handed to you by somebody who gets paid large sums of cash money to deal in violence for the entertainment of the masses.

What you, as a large man have to understand and live with, is that your size can be very intimidating to "normal" sized people, if you are expressing any kind of anger. That intimidation can be useful if the situation calls for it, but it can also escalate a situation well beyond whatever you intended, simply because you scared someone worse than you intended.

The antagonist in CC Italian's opening post was obviously way out of line. Without a doubt, he invaded their personal space. But, if he had been the same size as the OP, would the threat he communicated have come across as over the top as it did? For big guys like yourself, that is certainly something to think about. Stay safe.

[karder]

Whatever happened to old fashioned civility? People in our society no longer seem to feel any obligation to be polite or act like ladies and gentlemen. I bet if a couple of droopy pant, gold teeth gangsters had "taken" his spot instead of a lady, this fellow would have remembered his manners before the store manager had to threaten him by calling the police.