Now I understand 'Have a Conversation'

[puma guy]

Life in suburbia! Neighbors trading leaves, grass clippings clippings and of course dog poop! My neighbor would walk his three pit bulls to my yard for massive dumps. I finally took a plastic bag full and hung on his door with a nice note. Problem solved.

[The Annoyed Man]

Life in suburbia! Neighbors trading leaves, grass clippings clippings and of course dog poop! My neighbor would walk his three pit bulls to my yard for massive dumps. I finally took a plastic bag full and hung on his door with a nice note. Problem solved.

I've had that issue a couple of times. The last time I confronted a woman about not picking her dogs poo on my lawn, she said that she had forgotten and left her house without a plastic bag. I went inside, got a back, caught up with her down the block and gave her the bag, and asked her to do the right thing. Oddly enough, I've never seen her and her dog since on my block. I'm beginning to think that her "excuse" was a ruse.......

[mr1337]

In response to the original post:

In my CHL class, we went over conflict avoidance. One thing we read was about mental states in a conversation. There are 3 states: Parent, Child, Adult.

The best conversation is Adult-Adult, as you will avoid conflicts. It sounds like your neighbor wanted to have a Parent-Child conversation. Good on you for keeping you Adult hat on. If he had just come to you as an Adult as well, it would have been much better.

[TVGuy]

Not too long ago I had a neighbor that was terrible. They had bought the house from an older woman that passed estate. It was in need of updating. The guy would leave construction debris all over the yard and driveway, it looked terrible for the two years he messed with it. Near the end of their tenure (the house was about a week from being put on the market and "flipped"), he and has brother were in the back driveway with a circular saw at 910pm on a Thursday night. It had been going on for a while and we couldn't sleep. I politely asked them how much longer they would be working. He said "a while" with a not too pleasant tone. I mentioned it's against city ordinance to be doing such things that late and he started arguing about how he had until 10pm. I called in a disturbance since they obviously were not going to stop. There was no more noise about 20 minutes later.

Fast forward two weeks and the neighbor next to him had some people over on a Friday night and had the TV on in the back yard. The guy that had been sawing a week earlier went to his house in a rage about his baby not being able to sleep due to the TV...it was 715pm and a Friday night.

Some people are just unreasonable and think that rules are only for other people. I couldn't be happier that jerk moved.

[Jim Beaux]

His reply was something between a grunt and a funny sound meaning nothing, stuck his nose up in the air, spun about and retreated. Not absolutely sure, but I do not believe he drives a Prius, although he has the attitude to drive one.

Stew you should be ashamed at your lack of empathy for your neighbor. When he stalked away the least you could have done was offer him the use of your lawn equipment. Hey neighbor I have 2 rakes! One for you and one for the Prius you rode in on!

[Dadtodabone]

Great ringtone?
[youtube][/youtube]

[VMI77]

The best way to deal with neighbors is not to have any. Moving out of a subdivision onto many acres out in the country has eliminated 99% of my bad neighbor problems (well, actually 100% so far, but I'm allowing room for change).

[Cedar Park Dad]

The best way to deal with neighbors is not to have any. Moving out of a subdivision onto many acres out in the country has eliminated 99% of my bad neighbor problems (well, actually 100% so far, but I'm allowing room for change).

What happens when the subdivisions move out to you?

[The Annoyed Man]

The best way to deal with neighbors is not to have any. Moving out of a subdivision onto many acres out in the country has eliminated 99% of my bad neighbor problems (well, actually 100% so far, but I'm allowing room for change).

What happens when the subdivisions move out to you?

You electrify your fences, and you let large packs of big dogs loose on your property.

[BobCat]

Actually, once the feral hogs start rooting up the pasture, you realize that not all bad neighbors are human. But at least you can shoot or trap the hogs. And eat them.

[cb1000rider]

What happens when the subdivisions move out to you?

I've learned that you've got some amount of time to purchase enough property to create a buffer, otherwise assume that the suburb will move out to you.. It may take a decade or two, but it's coming.

Fence it in. Put in a gate. Install big dogs. That ends any confrontation with a neighbor that doesn't have your phone number or a good relationship with the dogs.

[jimlongley]

I have a Crape Myrtle in the front yard, along with something that has very small leaves, another small leaf tree and a maple in my side yard, and a Pecan and Crape Myrtle in the back yard, and a couple of elms at the side yard property line that no one is sure who they belong to. The most leaves in my yard and gutter are oaks, which are all on my neighbor's property. We co-exist peacefully..

[VMI77]

The best way to deal with neighbors is not to have any. Moving out of a subdivision onto many acres out in the country has eliminated 99% of my bad neighbor problems (well, actually 100% so far, but I'm allowing room for change).

What happens when the subdivisions move out to you?

I chose property where that possibility is pretty unlikely. We're not within any city or town limits. Several miles from a paved road. But if a subdivision did locate out my way I'd still be isolated on my 43 acres, with no close neighbors on less than about 12 acres (and I'm hoping to buy the 12 acres adjacent to me now, which will give me about 55 acres). And as cb100rider says....I'm fenced in and gated where it counts, and will be completely fenced in if I can get that adjacent 12 acres.

[Cedar Park Dad]

What happens when the subdivisions move out to you?

I've learned that you've got some amount of time to purchase enough property to create a buffer, otherwise assume that the suburb will move out to you.. It may take a decade or two, but it's coming.

Fence it in. Put in a gate. Install big dogs. That ends any confrontation with a neighbor that doesn't have your phone number or a good relationship with the dogs.

Good advise. I'd substitute an entire pack of ferocious wiener dogs though.

[threoh8]

Good advise. I'd substitute an entire pack of ferocious wiener dogs though.

Dachshunds like a plan to me!