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not even a ring yet and she's already telling you who can come over and play and who can't...

Have fun with that.

Like i said earlier it was not cigs i was talking about.

x007x wrote:Like i said earlier it was not cigs i was talking about.

By your statement, my assumption is that your friend is smoking something a little less legal. If my assumption is correct, then I would not blame her from wanting to keep your friend out of her home and trying to keep you away from him. It's less about the smoking and more about what could happen to you if you happened to be with your friend when he was caught in possession of an illegal substance.

x007x wrote:What do you think if you feel your girlfriend is going to want you to leave your best friend for 10 years, because he smokes?

I wouldn't do it. If she broke up with me because I continued to be friends with him, I dodged a bullet.

I would also delay the plans to move in together. Maybe that's just me but I don't do well with ultimatums if that's how someone "communicates" then it's not going to last. If it's a temporary condition then maybe some time apart will give her room to think

urnoodle wrote:

x007x wrote:Like i said earlier it was not cigs i was talking about.

By your statement, my assumption is that your friend is smoking something a little less legal. If my assumption is correct, then I would not blame her from wanting to keep your friend out of her home and trying to keep you away from him. It's less about the smoking and more about what could happen to you if you happened to be with your friend when he was caught in possession of an illegal substance.

That went way over my head.

well in that case, i would have to agree with your GF. yeah careful hanging out in his house when the flashbang goes off!

recaffeination wrote:

x007x wrote:What do you think if you feel your girlfriend is going to want you to leave your best friend for 10 years, because he smokes?

I wouldn't do it. If she broke up with me because I continued to be friends with him, I dodged a bullet.

I would also delay the plans to move in together. Maybe that's just me but I don't do well with ultimatums if that's how someone "communicates" then it's not going to last. If it's a temporary condition then maybe some time apart will give her room to think

I was okay with him not coming over, becuase I understand what shes thinking, but I could not leave a friend for a girl. Think of it in the long run; if I left my friend for her and then we break up. Thats not awkward going back to the friend..Umm yeah it didn't work out could we be friends again, lol..Knowing my friend, he would be irritated for a bit, but would still accept the friendship. She wants time to think if he is allowed. I said i'm okay with that, and im not pressuring her to say yes. I was telling her straight out do not ask me to leave me friend, and we talked. She said she would never do that, and not come between the friendship like that. I'm going to take her word for it.

Didn't catch the illegal drug use part. I do not knowingly associate with people that use illegal drugs and have parted ways with more than one friend because of their regular use of dope.

x007x wrote:Think of it in the long run; if I left my friend for her and then we break up. Thats not awkward going back to the friend..Umm yeah it didn't work out could we be friends again, lol..

Ed Zachary!

Although I am of the opinion that one illegal substance shouldn't be illegal, it is still illegal. I won't put myself in a position to be around anyone using it or anyone in possession of it where it is illegal. Now that I have my CHL, it's more important than ever to prevent myself from being in a situation where it can be preceived that I'm breaking the law. Sometimes it does mean saying good-bye to good friends. Just be honest about the reason why you are walking away. If he is a friend, he'll understand. Leave it open that when he is willing to change his lifestyle you would like to reconnect.

urnoodle wrote:Although I am of the opinion that one illegal substance shouldn't be illegal, it is still illegal. I won't put myself in a position to be around anyone using it or anyone in possession of it where it is illegal. Now that I have my CHL, it's more important than ever to prevent myself from being in a situation where it can be preceived that I'm breaking the law. Sometimes it does mean saying good-bye to good friends. Just be honest about the reason why you are walking away. If he is a friend, he'll understand. Leave it open that when he is willing to change his lifestyle you would like to reconnect.

Nicely, said.

WildBill wrote:

urnoodle wrote:

x007x wrote:Like i said earlier it was not cigs i was talking about.

By your statement, my assumption is that your friend is smoking something a little less legal. If my assumption is correct, then I would not blame her from wanting to keep your friend out of her home and trying to keep you away from him. It's less about the smoking and more about what could happen to you if you happened to be with your friend when he was caught in possession of an illegal substance.

That went way over my head.

You are not the only one. Maybe the OP should have been a little more explicit. I would have to think about that long and hard myself. She might not want you to lose your CHL and end up with a record.

VoiceofReason wrote:

WildBill wrote:

urnoodle wrote:

x007x wrote:Like i said earlier it was not cigs i was talking about.

By your statement, my assumption is that your friend is smoking something a little less legal. If my assumption is correct, then I would not blame her from wanting to keep your friend out of her home and trying to keep you away from him. It's less about the smoking and more about what could happen to you if you happened to be with your friend when he was caught in possession of an illegal substance.

That went way over my head.

You are not the only one. Maybe the OP should have been a little more explicit. I would have to think about that long and hard myself. She might not want you to lose your CHL and end up with a record.

Yeah, I didn't pick up on that either. I have a pretty strict "no illegal things in my car, house, or property" policy, but as far as I know it's never come up. Why would he lose his CHL if it was just his friend that was smoking it? Is it illegal just to be around the stuff?

There acutally is an App for iphones that has every up-to-date state law on the stuff..I think its illegal for the possesion, but i'm not sure though.

Riding around in the car with "Buddy" and get pulled over. Officer notices a baggy laying on the floor that "Buddy" dropped. "Buddy" claims it's not his. Judge gets to determine who the rightful owner is. Press writes stories about how CHL holders hang out with drug dealers and nazi paraphernalia enthusiasts at gun shows.