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Re: Wife: I prefer to live in the "lala" land

Posted: Fri Jul 13, 2012 9:40 pm
by birdman253
I am a fairly new CHL holder, about two months. When I first told her that I was going to get the license, her first response was, "Why do you think you need one?" I explained that due to work, I am often in dangerous areas, alone, and have had several friends recommend that I start being armed.

After a couple of days to think about it, she agreed that it made sense that I be able to defend myself. I took her with me when I went to buy a new pistol, since I wanted a new Glock as EDC. She was a little hesitant to even go in the gun store. After getting inside, they were slow, and one of the clerks was nice enough to show her different handguns, and discuss self-defense with her, while I looked at, and decided for sure on which handgun I preferred. After leaving the store, she told me that she now had a better understanding of why I was doing this, and that it probably was a good idea.

After class, and the wait for the license, it arrived. I showed it to her, and let her know that I had received it. I started carrying the next day. Three weeks later, she noticed a bulge under my shirt (I carry IWB at 4:00) and asked about it. We had just arrived home after running errands for several hours, catching lunch, and had been in close proximity to each other the entire day. I pulled up my shirt, and showed her that I was carrying, and she said she couldn't believe that I had had it all day, and she hadn't seen it. She was totally floored when I told her that I had carried it for the last three weeks, since I received my license. She just couldn't believe that not only had no one noticed it, but that she hadn't either.

Since then we have talked several times about it, and she has come to realize that it is like insurance. You have it in case you need it, and fervently pray that you never have to utilize it. She also told me just last night that she feels safer when we are out, knowing that I have it. She has health and mobility issues, and has realized that in the unlikely event that we are attacked, or accosted, she can neither fight nor run. She has come to realize that I have it for her protection, as well as my own, and is not only comfortable with it, but actually encourages me to carry.

I realize that her "transformation" was quick, and others probably won't move that fast, but she has a good head on her shoulders, and has been able to internalize that it is there only for the worst case scenario. She even over the last few days has asked me if I was carrying, and if I wasn't, why not? (I had a day when I had to visit a hospital that is 30.06 posted.) I told her that I carry whenever it is legal, and she was ok with that.

Some may feel that I have been lucky in this regard, but I feel that I have been lucky in not just this, but that I am fortunate to live in the greatest state, in the greatest nation in the world, have the right to defend myself and family, and that I have the greatest wife in the world.

Re: Wife: I prefer to live in the "lala" land

Posted: Fri Jul 13, 2012 10:45 pm
by Jasonw560
Mine is still being a big old hoplophobe. One of her best friends' husbands CCs, and we're still working on her.

Re: Wife: I prefer to live in the "lala" land

Posted: Sat Jul 14, 2012 9:19 am
by teri
I "was" that wife until about a year ago. I have known for years that my husband wanted to take the course and be able to carry. We had discussed both of us doing it but I must admit I felt it was a safe topic to discuss because the cost was so prohibitive that I thought it would never happen. I wrinkled my brows at him every time the subject came up. As luck would have it, just before his 50th bday I came across a Groupon for the class. I knew it would be a total surprise. After he got his CHL in March I was shocked to find he was planning to carry it EVERYWHERE! OMG, what had I done? :shock: He was real good at not being preachy about it and as I learned more I was feeling better about it.

I grew up with guns for hunting in the house, not necessarily for protection. It was a strange concept to me. I was telling one of my work friends about it when she "confessed" she had her CHL! She is the kindest, gentlest heart I've ever known. Well, that got me thinking... I suddenly became aware of my surroundings when I would go out or leave work late...in a lightly lit parking garage. I am far from paranoid, I just woke up from "lala land". When I came across another coupon I decided I would take the class. Now my perception of CHL holders has totally turned around. Now, I "get it". I almost want to say "I drank the kool-aid" but I think I drank the antidote! :cheers2:

Now I await my CHL. and look forward to being able to take my safety into my own hands when my husband isn't around. The class made me feel empowered. It is a feeling that is hard to describe. The seatbelt analogy explains the reason to carry very well. I take this responsibility seriously and plan to continue my education on the subject.

Sorry for the long book. :oops: I just wanted to explain in detail what the others said about the sign and how we woman don't really like something shoved in our faces, we sometimes need to find our own way. Hopefully with time your wife will come around to at least understanding/accepting your decision to carry. Baby steps...plus if make you make it seem like it was our idea it will be a win for both! :mrgreen:

Re: Wife: I prefer to live in the "lala" land

Posted: Sat Jul 14, 2012 9:32 am
by Panzer Possum
AEA wrote:Sorry, I can't help you with this one.........

But I can tell you what I did.........
Instead of buying shoes, dresses, coats, fingernails, hair-do's, purses, anything and everything that comes in a makeup bottle and many other things that were totally a waste of money,...........I just got rid of the Wife, moved and bought more guns! "rlol"
That's one solution that works.

Re: Wife: I prefer to live in the "lala" land

Posted: Sun Jul 15, 2012 6:18 am
by Beiruty
Update, I am now carrying OWB using my custom laser/light/pistol Kydex holsters. My wife bought me two very chic sleeveless vests. I love my wife. Last night I carried and visited our friend who had another family visiting too. No one had a clue I was carrying. Even when I unzipped the vest, still no one noticed my pistol at 2:00 PM.

Re: Wife: I prefer to live in the "lala" land

Posted: Sun Jul 15, 2012 12:04 pm
by VoiceofReason
When I told my wife of 43 years that I had decided to get my CHL and two guns she opposed it. I mentioned it a few more times and she objected each time. Finally I mentioned it, she opposed it, and I told her “get used to it” it’s going to happen.

Now I have a Kimber, a BUG and my wife actually feels safer knowing I can protect us. ;-)

I have carried a pistol off and on, in the car or on me for 43 years. She doesn’t like guns but feels safer with one around. :lol:

Re: Wife: I prefer to live in the "lala" land

Posted: Sun Jul 15, 2012 3:52 pm
by danpaw
I decided a long time ago that decisions about my familys protection would be made by me.

Re: Wife: I prefer to live in the "lala" land

Posted: Sun Jul 15, 2012 4:18 pm
by dac1842
My wife asks me all the time if I am carrying. Not because she is questioning why I carry, she likes to know the gun is there. She knows all too well that crap happens, it is better to be prepared in case it does than regret leaving the weapon(s) at home.

Re: Wife: I prefer to live in the "lala" land

Posted: Sun Jul 15, 2012 4:22 pm
by snatchel
My wife isn't big on guns, but she can shoot well. She doesn't like that I spend quite a bit of money for CC purposes (holsters, guns, grips, ammo, training.)

She won't go so far as to openly object to my carrying, but I can tell that she would rather I find a different "hobby."

That said, there have been several times when we were walking around Dallas or Big Spring or wherever else, and she quietly asked, "you are carrying, right?"

She understands why I carry. She supports me as far as the checkbook goes, to an extent. But, she doesn't necessarily agree that I should carry all the time.

Re: Wife: I prefer to live in the "lala" land

Posted: Sun Jul 15, 2012 4:34 pm
by Hoosier Daddy
Beiruty wrote:Update, I am now carrying OWB using my custom laser/light/pistol Kydex holsters. My wife bought me two very chic sleeveless vests. I love my wife. Last night I carried and visited our friend who had another family visiting too. No one had a clue I was carrying. Even when I unzipped the vest, still no one noticed my pistol at 2:00 PM.
That's a great example of how the right compromise can benefit everyone.

Re: Wife: I prefer to live in the "lala" land

Posted: Sun Jul 15, 2012 4:40 pm
by WildBill
Hoosier Daddy wrote:
Beiruty wrote:Update, I am now carrying OWB using my custom laser/light/pistol Kydex holsters. My wife bought me two very chic sleeveless vests. I love my wife. Last night I carried and visited our friend who had another family visiting too. No one had a clue I was carrying. Even when I unzipped the vest, still no one noticed my pistol at 2:00 PM.
That's a great example of how the right compromise can benefit everyone.
:iagree: Although, I still want to see pictures of a two "very chic vests" with zippers.

Re: Wife: I prefer to live in the "lala" land

Posted: Sun Jul 15, 2012 5:10 pm
by Hoosier Daddy
WildBill wrote: :iagree: Although, I still want to see pictures of a two "very chic vests" with zippers.
Do they make a vest version of this?

Image

Re: Wife: I prefer to live in the "lala" land

Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2012 4:59 am
by Beiruty
Hoosier Daddy wrote:
WildBill wrote: :iagree: Although, I still want to see pictures of a two "very chic vests" with zippers.
Do they make a vest version of this?

Image
If my wife likes said vests, I am satisfied with looks. She is really picky.

Re: Wife: I prefer to live in the "lala" land

Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2012 1:54 pm
by glbedd53
That's an old pic of MJ, back before he was a white guy.

Re: Wife: I prefer to live in the "lala" land

Posted: Mon Jul 16, 2012 2:34 pm
by Beiruty
here is one of the Vests, they are by Eddie Bower.
Image