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Re: One liners?
Posted: Wed Feb 15, 2017 3:10 pm
by Syntyr
oohrah wrote:Neutron walks into a bar, bartender says "no charge".
A sandwich walks in to a bar and the bartender says "Hey we dont serve your kind here!"
Re: One liners?
Posted: Wed Feb 15, 2017 3:11 pm
by Syntyr
"Where ever you go... there you are!" Buckaroo Banzai
"Time is so that everything doesnt happen all at once." Buckaroo Banzai
Re: One liners?
Posted: Wed Feb 15, 2017 4:28 pm
by tomneal
1911 It's just like a Glock, only for men!
Re: One liners?
Posted: Wed Feb 15, 2017 4:29 pm
by tomneal
The family that prays together, stays together. The family that shoots together, shouldn't be messed with.
Re: One liners?
Posted: Wed Feb 15, 2017 10:53 pm
by mescobar_rpls
Two cannibals are eating a clown; one asks, "does this taste funny to you?"
Re: One liners?
Posted: Thu Feb 16, 2017 12:01 am
by Dadtodabone
Take my wife, please.
Re: One liners?
Posted: Thu Feb 16, 2017 7:37 am
by txglock21
I told my wife I was going for a walk. She asked how long I was going to be gone? I told her, "The whole time".
Re: One liners?
Posted: Thu Feb 16, 2017 7:55 am
by Jusme
These are great keep em coming.
The only issue is, people like myself, TAM, and several others, have a difficult time just writing one line.

Re: One liners?
Posted: Thu Feb 16, 2017 8:34 am
by mayor
Transposed musician jokes:
How do you get a progressive (or drummer) off your pourch? Pay for the pizza.
What do you call a progressive in a suit? defendant.
what do you call a progressive that just lost his girl frieind? homeless.
what do you toss to a drowning guitar player? his amp.
Re: One liners?
Posted: Thu Feb 16, 2017 5:09 pm
by JustSomeOldGuy
Self-adjusting brakes, don't.....
Re: One liners?
Posted: Thu Feb 16, 2017 5:29 pm
by cmgee67
How do you leave an Aggie in suspense........
Re: One liners?
Posted: Thu Feb 16, 2017 7:33 pm
by puma guy
As the veterinarian gives his dog a shot the owner asks, "Will it hurt?" Vet says, " I won't feel a thing."
Not really all that funny I know, but my dad was a vet and I heard that line many times!
Re: One liners?
Posted: Thu Feb 16, 2017 7:55 pm
by Mxrdad
Humphrey: The name of a camel with no humps.
Re: One liners?
Posted: Thu Feb 16, 2017 8:03 pm
by Ameer
If at first you don't succeed, so much for skydiving.
Confession is good for the soul, but bad for the career.