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Stopped shaving on the family vacation at the start of summer. Now seven weeks into a van dyck and have enough growth to start brushing, waxing, and grooming the mustache with the goal of a handlebar. Bought my wax from The Bearded B*stard, out of Austin. I have too much Mediterranean genetics to have thick facial hear, so am hoping that longer, overlaid mustache whiskers will be thicker than my past attempts.

I grow hair fairly vigorously pretty much everywhere except the top of my head.

I was in AFROTC in college. As a minimum every Thursday we would have to be in uniform for an academic class and a "Leadership Lab" period where we would do cadet-led things, like teach Drill and Ceremonies.

In December 1981, my senior year in college, a few of us were sitting around the AFROTC cadet lounge shooting the bull about the upcoming Christmas break between semesters. Somebody pointed out that between the last Leadership Lab in December and the first one in January we would have about four weeks without required uniform wear. He further opined that it was possible that we would go on active duty right after commissioning the following May, and we were all planning on full length careers...so the last chance for any of us to grow a beard was Christmas break.

Thus was born the pledge for all of us to let it grow, reconvene in about four weeks, and see who had the best beard. Amazingly no beer was involved in this plan, probably for the best.

So off we went to finals week, two weeks of holiday, a week of registration, and then the first week of school. My beard grew in rather well if I do say so myself. It covered my face very well, no scraggly look at all, nice even brown color.

As I strolled down the hallway outside the AFROTC offices I passed my detachment commander, an active duty Lieutenant Colonel. His eyes cut sideways at me and I heard him mumble something about "safety hazard." I passed one of the NCOs assigned to the detachment and he asked me "How's the Yukon, Jack?" One of the Captains came out of his office, rolled his eyes and went right back in shaking his head.

I turned into the cadet lounge where the rest of the "competitors" had already assembled and...not a single one of them had a beard. Not even stubble. I immediately challenged them, and they sheepishly admitted that their "beards" were so puny and sparse that they gave up. I accused them all of being low-testosterone eunuchs and worse.

The really good part was that the girls LOVED my beard. They would come up, gently run their hands over it, and coo about it. Man why didn't I think of this earlier?

The bad part was that the next day I had to shave it off to meet AFR 35-10 specs for the first Leadership Lab.

Thus endeth my bearded days.

AFROTC was indeed followed by nearly 23 years in the USAF, and now when I let it grow out, somehow it has turned white and a two day stubble ends up giving me the "homeless" look.

I tried. It was thin and patchy. I just looked scruffy and bowed to reality. I can't grow a decent beard.

ELB wrote:AFROTC was indeed followed by nearly 23 years in the USAF, and now when I let it grow out, somehow it has turned white and a two day stubble ends up giving me the "homeless" look.

I'll tell you what though.... if it will still grow in nice and thick in 4 weeks, you really owe it to yourself to grow it out at least once. After I grew mine out, teenagers starting jumping to open doors for me and treating me with great deference, dogs and cats seem to love me, little kids stare at me wide-eyed while ask them if they have been good little boys and girls, and make Santa jokes to their parents, who wink and go along with it. Young couples hang on my every word of marriage wisdom like I was Solomon himself. Beautiful young women suddenly started treating me like I am their sainted old Papaw. My grandkids love to play with it. Heck, after the first couple of weeks, it doesn't even itch anymore. There just isn't a down side.

Since I grew my beard out, I also noticed that my shooting has improved drastically. My truck gets better fuel mileage, and my tractor seems to run better too.

The Annoyed Man wrote:

ELB wrote:AFROTC was indeed followed by nearly 23 years in the USAF, and now when I let it grow out, somehow it has turned white and a two day stubble ends up giving me the "homeless" look.

I'll tell you what though.... if it will still grow in nice and thick in 4 weeks, you really owe it to yourself to grow it out at least once. After I grew mine out, teenagers starting jumping to open doors for me and treating me with great deference, dogs and cats seem to love me, little kids stare at me wide-eyed while ask them if they have been good little boys and girls, and make Santa jokes to their parents, who wink and go along with it. Young couples hang on my every word of marriage wisdom like I was Solomon himself. Beautiful young women suddenly started treating me like I am their sainted old Papaw. My grandkids love to play with it. Heck, after the first couple of weeks, it doesn't even itch anymore. There just isn't a down side.

There is one down side.
All the food that gets stuck in it.

cheezit wrote:

The Annoyed Man wrote:

ELB wrote:AFROTC was indeed followed by nearly 23 years in the USAF, and now when I let it grow out, somehow it has turned white and a two day stubble ends up giving me the "homeless" look.

I'll tell you what though.... if it will still grow in nice and thick in 4 weeks, you really owe it to yourself to grow it out at least once. After I grew mine out, teenagers starting jumping to open doors for me and treating me with great deference, dogs and cats seem to love me, little kids stare at me wide-eyed while ask them if they have been good little boys and girls, and make Santa jokes to their parents, who wink and go along with it. Young couples hang on my every word of marriage wisdom like I was Solomon himself. Beautiful young women suddenly started treating me like I am their sainted old Papaw. My grandkids love to play with it. Heck, after the first couple of weeks, it doesn't even itch anymore. There just isn't a down side.

There is one down side.
All the food that gets stuck in it.

Not at all. That's strategic measure to ensure uninterrupted nourishment during zombie apocalypse.

parabelum wrote:

cheezit wrote:

The Annoyed Man wrote:

ELB wrote:AFROTC was indeed followed by nearly 23 years in the USAF, and now when I let it grow out, somehow it has turned white and a two day stubble ends up giving me the "homeless" look.

I'll tell you what though.... if it will still grow in nice and thick in 4 weeks, you really owe it to yourself to grow it out at least once. After I grew mine out, teenagers starting jumping to open doors for me and treating me with great deference, dogs and cats seem to love me, little kids stare at me wide-eyed while ask them if they have been good little boys and girls, and make Santa jokes to their parents, who wink and go along with it. Young couples hang on my every word of marriage wisdom like I was Solomon himself. Beautiful young women suddenly started treating me like I am their sainted old Papaw. My grandkids love to play with it. Heck, after the first couple of weeks, it doesn't even itch anymore. There just isn't a down side.

There is one down side.
All the food that gets stuck in it.

Not at all. That's strategic measure to ensure uninterrupted nourishment during zombie apocalypse.

Exactly..... I'm just saving it for later.

The Annoyed Man wrote:

parabelum wrote:

cheezit wrote:

The Annoyed Man wrote:

ELB wrote:AFROTC was indeed followed by nearly 23 years in the USAF, and now when I let it grow out, somehow it has turned white and a two day stubble ends up giving me the "homeless" look.

I'll tell you what though.... if it will still grow in nice and thick in 4 weeks, you really owe it to yourself to grow it out at least once. After I grew mine out, teenagers starting jumping to open doors for me and treating me with great deference, dogs and cats seem to love me, little kids stare at me wide-eyed while ask them if they have been good little boys and girls, and make Santa jokes to their parents, who wink and go along with it. Young couples hang on my every word of marriage wisdom like I was Solomon himself. Beautiful young women suddenly started treating me like I am their sainted old Papaw. My grandkids love to play with it. Heck, after the first couple of weeks, it doesn't even itch anymore. There just isn't a down side.

There is one down side.
All the food that gets stuck in it.

Not at all. That's strategic measure to ensure uninterrupted nourishment during zombie apocalypse.

Exactly..... I'm just saving it for later.

Also the amount of mustache hair I have most likly consumed, but the left over food in it incress it's nutritional value

cheezit wrote:

The Annoyed Man wrote:

parabelum wrote:

cheezit wrote:

The Annoyed Man wrote:

ELB wrote:AFROTC was indeed followed by nearly 23 years in the USAF, and now when I let it grow out, somehow it has turned white and a two day stubble ends up giving me the "homeless" look.

I'll tell you what though.... if it will still grow in nice and thick in 4 weeks, you really owe it to yourself to grow it out at least once. After I grew mine out, teenagers starting jumping to open doors for me and treating me with great deference, dogs and cats seem to love me, little kids stare at me wide-eyed while ask them if they have been good little boys and girls, and make Santa jokes to their parents, who wink and go along with it. Young couples hang on my every word of marriage wisdom like I was Solomon himself. Beautiful young women suddenly started treating me like I am their sainted old Papaw. My grandkids love to play with it. Heck, after the first couple of weeks, it doesn't even itch anymore. There just isn't a down side.

There is one down side.
All the food that gets stuck in it.

Not at all. That's strategic measure to ensure uninterrupted nourishment during zombie apocalypse.

Exactly..... I'm just saving it for later.

Also the amount of mustache hair I have most likly consumed, but the left over food in it incress it's nutritional value

Bingo! And it's less socially unacceptable than eating your own boogers.

This is mine now

parabelum wrote:Since I grew my beard out, I also noticed that my shooting has improved drastically. My truck gets better fuel mileage, and my tractor seems to run better too.

I shave every Sunday morning before church...

I was out of town two weekends running so I hadn't shaved. Our worship leader (he's young but he can almost grow a respectable beard) said my beard looked good and that I should keep it. My wife nixed the idea...lol.

...and here I was thinking the new air filter I installed in my truck was what increased my gas mileage!

The Annoyed Man wrote:

ELB wrote:AFROTC was indeed followed by nearly 23 years in the USAF, and now when I let it grow out, somehow it has turned white and a two day stubble ends up giving me the "homeless" look.

I'll tell you what though.... if it will still grow in nice and thick in 4 weeks, you really owe it to yourself to grow it out at least once. ...

Yeah, but I am pretty sure that while I would aim for this:



I would end up with this:

ELB wrote:

The Annoyed Man wrote:

ELB wrote:AFROTC was indeed followed by nearly 23 years in the USAF, and now when I let it grow out, somehow it has turned white and a two day stubble ends up giving me the "homeless" look.

I'll tell you what though.... if it will still grow in nice and thick in 4 weeks, you really owe it to yourself to grow it out at least once. ...

Yeah, but I am pretty sure that while I would aim for this:



I would end up with this:

Yeah I would definitely keep it shaved then, if it causes a swastika to grow between your eyes!!

I've had one since 2011.



My dad had one from his 40s on. I never really considered it until I started contracting overseas and got tired of shaving