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Re: First Wife Protest

Posted: Fri Jul 26, 2013 11:26 pm
by Oldgringo
Fast forward two years: Is the OP and the OP's wart still together? :mrgreen:

Re: First Wife Protest

Posted: Sat Jul 27, 2013 6:22 am
by CHL_Padawan
Thank you Pawpaw. That actually clears up my confusion on the church issue.

Next I need to learn how to do those forum quotes where the name of the speaker is after the quote.

Right now, I have to get ready for my CHL class. It's under 1 hour before I walk out my door.

Re: First Wife Protest

Posted: Sat Jul 27, 2013 9:57 am
by LikesShinyThings
CHL_Padawan wrote: Next I need to learn how to do those forum quotes where the name of the speaker is after the quote.
When you are logged in, there is a 'QUOTE' button on the top right section of each post (in the forum view I use, it is immediately to the left of the right-hand panel that includes the info about the poster, eg name, number of posts, when they joined, etc). Clicking it inserts the quote tags, including the poster's name.

Good luck with your course. I'm sure you'll do great.
Oldgringo wrote:Fast forward two years: Is the OP and the OP's wart still together? :mrgreen:
I seem to recall seeing a post a week or two ago from the OP indicating that the wife was coming around.

Re: First Wife Protest

Posted: Sat Jul 27, 2013 11:40 am
by Kiowa Scout
Blindref757 wrote:Update...just a little bit over 2 yrs ago, I posted this within a couple of weeks of getting my plastic. Fast forward to current date. She has been with me to the range, she has started shopping for a gun, she is waiting on the new rules to kick in for getting her CHL, and she no longer protests, objects, or asks about if I'm carrying--she expects it. It took her some getting used to, and it didn't hurt that I got a Kahr CM9 that fits perfectly into a DeSantis pocket holster and conceals without printing and has no outward hardware.

Didn't have to trade her in! :thumbs2: I appreciate everyone who opined along the way! Many of you are great mentors to new CHL holders like myself. Thank You! :tiphat:
It's wonderful to hear that she now has a better understanding of your decision to carry. I have been blessed with a wife who understands my decision to carry as well. She has now changed her way of think so much that many times she will not go to town to get groceries if I am working because she doesn't want to go alone and be unprepared.
A couple of weeks ago, I was getting ready to go church and she noticed that I had added so gear to my normal carry. She asked me why. I told her that I just felt today I needed to be more prepared. When I got to church, one of the elders that also has his chl asked me if I was carrying. I replied that was a foolish question that he already knew the answer to. He informed me that our guest speaker had several death threats placed on him and was concerned for his safety. I told him that we would sit by the guest so that I could protect my family should something occur.
After church, my wife and I talked about my gut feeling that morning. She said "You had His leading on what to do today and you followed through with it."

Isn't it funny how if we are lead by the Spirit, things work out Okay.

Re: First Wife Protest

Posted: Sat Jul 27, 2013 3:37 pm
by OnceFired
I haven't carried while at church, but I have brought my pistol in the car there. Lotta good that would do me if I actually needed it inside, but I know my wife would be (and has been) uncomfortable with me carrying inside. Everything in stages is how I have approached this.

That said, when we moved to Springfield and my wife selected that we try this church, we all loved it. We met the pastor that day, and we learned he is a huge shooter, gun collector and a reloader to boot. I believe my wife would have FAR less objections after that little conversation. :) And, I of course intend to test that theory in short order.

For any man that is having an issue getting past this hurdle - I would propose a simple question to your wife. Ask her if God is going to take care "of everything" while she's at church, then she really doesn't need her purse, right? If you can't get the whole purse into the conversation, limit the point to be about lipstick, or tissues, or whatever. At some point you will prevail here is my expectation.

Or, if she is willing to go into church completely abandoned to God taking care of every earthly contingency because it's "time to worship" - it is time to ask her how she should behave re: purse/lipstick etc every day of her life. According to the "i don't need my purse at church" line of thinking, you can easily sway her more. This is because we are to live for Jesus every day every moment, not just on Sunday mornings.

So now she would need to go without purse, makeup, tissues, etc EVERY DAY ALL DAY FOR THE REST OF HER LIFE because she is trusting the Lord to provide. The absurdity of the line of thinking will become apparent. No one believes we need to give up every tool at our disposal because God will magically provide what you need everywhere. If that was true, I wouldn't even need my car keys to get TO church every Sunday. :)

God *WANTS* us to be good shepherds and *EXPECTS* us to use the tools at our disposal. After all, HE gave them to us.

And a last important note. None of this is is intended to be adversarial between spouses in the least - as the husband's role is to be a LEADER not a controller. Honoryour wife freely & frequently, and she will submit to your lead regardless of what it is.

OnceFired

Re: First Wife Protest

Posted: Sun Jul 28, 2013 12:23 am
by Oldgringo
delete

Re: First Wife Protest

Posted: Sun Jul 28, 2013 12:26 am
by CHL_Padawan
LikesShinyThings wrote: When you are logged in, there is a 'QUOTE' button on the top right section of each post (in the forum view I use, it is immediately to the left of the right-hand panel that includes the info about the poster, eg name, number of posts, when they joined, etc). Clicking it inserts the quote tags, including the poster's name.

Good luck with your course. I'm sure you'll do great.
That was easy enough. :woohoo
And so was the quoting.

Thanks on both accounts.

Re: First Wife Protest

Posted: Sun Jul 28, 2013 12:30 am
by Oldgringo
OnceFired wrote:I haven't carried while at church, but I have brought my pistol in the car there. Lotta good that would do me if I actually needed it inside, but I know my wife would be (and has been) uncomfortable with me carrying inside. Everything in stages is how I have approached this.

That said, when we moved to Springfield and my wife selected that we try this church, we all loved it. We met the pastor that day, and we learned he is a huge shooter, gun collector and a reloader to boot. I believe my wife would have FAR less objections after that little conversation. :) And, I of course intend to test that theory in short order.

For any man that is having an issue getting past this hurdle - I would propose a simple question to your wife. Ask her if God is going to take care "of everything" while she's at church, then she really doesn't need her purse, right? If you can't get the whole purse into the conversation, limit the point to be about lipstick, or tissues, or whatever. At some point you will prevail here is my expectation.

Or, if she is willing to go into church completely abandoned to God taking care of every earthly contingency because it's "time to worship" - it is time to ask her how she should behave re: purse/lipstick etc every day of her life. According to the "i don't need my purse at church" line of thinking, you can easily sway her more. This is because we are to live for Jesus every day every moment, not just on Sunday mornings.

So now she would need to go without purse, makeup, tissues, etc EVERY DAY ALL DAY FOR THE REST OF HER LIFE because she is trusting the Lord to provide. The absurdity of the line of thinking will become apparent. No one believes we need to give up every tool at our disposal because God will magically provide what you need everywhere. If that was true, I wouldn't even need my car keys to get TO church every Sunday. :)

God *WANTS* us to be good shepherds and *EXPECTS* us to use the tools at our disposal. After all, HE gave them to us.

And a last important note. None of this is is intended to be adversarial between spouses in the least - as the husband's role is to be a LEADER not a controller. Honoryour wife freely & frequently, and she will submit to your lead regardless of what it is.

OnceFired
I didn't think religious stuff was allowed on this forum. Rule 11 or thereabouts? :rules:

Re: First Wife Protest

Posted: Sun Jul 28, 2013 6:33 pm
by OnceFired
I meant no disrespect, and you have a fair point. I hadn't realized there was that rule, and I take responsibility for that. If it is best for this to turn into a PM discussion, I'm cool with taking it to that if there is interest.

On the other hand, it is hard to discuss concealed carry at a place of worship without discussing said faith, especially if faith seems to be the source / reason the concealed carry cannot occur without hard feelings. And we're 5 pages into a thread about CC at church + wife. Categorically, it seems silly to discuss church without religion/faith.

OnceFired

Re: First Wife Protest

Posted: Sun Jul 28, 2013 6:43 pm
by jmra
Oldgringo wrote:I didn't think religious stuff was allowed on this forum. Rule 11 or thereabouts? :rules:
Hope you're wrong. I find the Prayer Request section of this forum invaluable.

Re: First Wife Protest

Posted: Sun Jul 28, 2013 11:41 pm
by Oldgringo
jmra wrote:
Oldgringo wrote:I didn't think religious stuff was allowed on this forum. Rule 11 or thereabouts? :rules:
Hope you're wrong. I find the Prayer Request section of this forum invaluable.
Good luck! :tiphat:

Re: First Wife Protest

Posted: Wed Aug 07, 2013 10:09 am
by goose
Blindref757 wrote:Update...just a little bit over 2 yrs ago, I posted this within a couple of weeks of getting my plastic. Fast forward to current date. She has been with me to the range, she has started shopping for a gun, she is waiting on the new rules to kick in for getting her CHL, and she no longer protests, objects, or asks about if I'm carrying--she expects it. It took her some getting used to, and it didn't hurt that I got a Kahr CM9 that fits perfectly into a DeSantis pocket holster and conceals without printing and has no outward hardware.

Didn't have to trade her in! :thumbs2: I appreciate everyone who opined along the way! Many of you are great mentors to new CHL holders like myself. Thank You! :tiphat:
An excellent thread revival (no pun intended). I enjoyed reading your take on marriage and relationships. A good 2A result is just gravy.

Re: First Wife Protest

Posted: Wed Aug 07, 2013 12:14 pm
by anygunanywhere
Oldgringo wrote:
I didn't think religious stuff was allowed on this forum. Rule 11 or thereabouts? :rules:
We talk about carry in church all of the time including the justifications for doing so.

Anygunanywhere

Re: First Wife Protest

Posted: Wed Aug 28, 2013 11:00 pm
by LAYGO
Wife's First Protest

Or

First Protest From Wife

All this time I'm thinking it's your Ex!

Re: First Wife Protest

Posted: Wed Aug 28, 2013 11:31 pm
by baldeagle
I've only been married for 41 years, so I'm staying completely out of this. :biggrinjester: