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What the wife thinks?
Posted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 10:05 am
by paynewp
I have finally received the plastic and have been carring ever since the day it arrived. My wife thinks that there is no need to be armed all the time. I get the eye roll almost everytime I leave with my weapon. She is not against the CHL but thinks everything is fine and that I should not be carring everywhere we go. She like to shoot every now and then and is not afraid to use the house protection. How can I get my point across that anything can happen at anytime?
Re: What the wife thinks?
Posted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 10:08 am
by Purplehood
By continuing to arm yourself each and everytime you get up.
Re: What the wife thinks?
Posted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 10:09 am
by USA1
i hate the dreaded " eye roll "
but its better than the the most feared look .. the stink eye
some of you may know that look .
Re: What the wife thinks?
Posted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 10:17 am
by seamusTX
I have posted dozens (or maybe hundreds by now) of news stories about people who were attacked in all sorts of places, including their own homes, churches, hospitals, and private offices. Most of them are in the Off Topic forum.
Or go to
http://news.google.com" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false; and search for "home invasion," "carjacking," "robbery," "rape," "murder," etc. There are hundreds of violent crimes every day in the U.S.
The point that is difficult for many people to understand is that you can go your entire life without using a weapon to defend yourself; but when you need one, nothing else will do.
- Jim
Re: What the wife thinks?
Posted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 10:23 am
by GeekwithaGun
Thanks Jim. I may setup a news alert and have them sent to my wife and my daughter's (19 and in colleges email address. Just to keep them reminded of the BG's that want to take what they want, when they want it and without regard to anyone else.
Re: What the wife thinks?
Posted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 10:28 am
by seamusTX
Setting up a news alert might be overkill. As I said, there are literally hundreds of incidents a day. Many of them involve domestic abuse or criminals attacking other criminals or the police, and it's easy to dismiss those as the kind of thing that an honest citizen would not get involved in.
BTW, I just noticed that the OP got his license three days ago. The wife will probably get used to the situation in a short while.
- Jim
Re: What the wife thinks?
Posted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 10:37 am
by frazzled
She puts up with all your other annoying habits. She'll get used to this one as well over time.

Re: What the wife thinks?
Posted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 10:47 am
by AEA
Amazing what they will put up with for their free meal ticket!

Re: What the wife thinks?
Posted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 10:51 am
by joe817
Re: What the wife thinks?
Posted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 10:59 am
by AggieMM
Here's what worked for me, and maybe it'll work for you.
Be patient and honest. Have several discussions with her, finding out her issues and roadblocks. Talk about her fears. Keep it open and honest, but use this time to find out her doubts. Don't try to solve them at first, just listen. Once my wife and I really started talking about it, she got past the typical anti arguments (mostly false and Hollywood driven), and I started to find out her real issues. Over time, start addressing these fears with sound answers and facts, try to keep your emotions in check.
While listening to these talks, start formulating your true reason for carrying. My reasons were primarily for security and "self-preservation" of the family. If you have kids, be sure you have a plan to address the security of the gun (home safe, car safe, etc). Talk about how you plan to educate your kids on gun safety.
It took me about a year to convince my wife it was a good idea, and she is "ok" with it now. But once she understood why I wanted to carry, and how I was planning on doing it, and how I would protect/educate the kids, she came around to it.
One discussion point I used that was very effective was:
When we're 90 years old, I really hope you'll hit me in the back of the head and say "See I told you so, you didn't need to carry that piece of metal around for all of those years, see you didn't need it." I'd rather have that conversion with you than the "I wish I had been carrying when XYZ happened many years ago, I could have prevent ABC from getting hurt."
I asked her which conversation she'd rather have when we're 90.
Furthermore, get some training, even if it is basic. Learn to use the gun correctly and safely. Show your wife that you're serious about safety. Start competing in IPSC and/or IDPA. This will get you familiar with your gun.
Good luck, but be patient, and she'll come around.

Just my $0.02....
Ryan
Re: What the wife thinks?
Posted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 11:16 am
by paynewp
Thanks for the input! My wife never even knew I had a gun till 2 years ago. We have been togeather for 21yrs. My kids started to get older and thought it was time to get them familer with the right way to handle guns. Too much Halo got me worried that they really thought you can had more than one life. I have had guns and shot since I was 9, never made a big deal out of it since we have been togeather she has always thought guns were over kill for protection. Since we have moved to our own place and I started to work nights again I made her awhere of how to keep her and the kids safe when I am not home. She has no probs using force if needed and she may get use to me carring it after a few months. I do plan on expanding my training and even thought about shooting competitions. I am less than a mile from a outdoor gun range but they do not allow fast shooting. Thanks All!
Re: What the wife thinks?
Posted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 11:46 am
by Drewthetexan
usa1 wrote:i hate the dreaded " eye roll "
but its better than the the most feared look .. the stink eye
some of you may know that look .
this reminds me of it...
[/hijack]
Re: What the wife thinks?
Posted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 12:41 pm
by Pete92FS
frazzled wrote:She puts up with all your other annoying habits. She'll get used to this one as well over time.

I've gotten plenty of eye rolls from Mrs. Pete92FS since I received my plastic back in January.
First she made a statement about carrying all the time. I gave her the spiel about the one time something happens it's going to be when you decided not to carry that particular time - Eye Roll.
Next she asked why I carry around the house? Explained that if someone comes busting through the front door they are not politely going to wait for me to run upstairs to get my piece - Eye Roll.
One time we were out and her hip brushed up against my side where I had the gun holstered and she jumped like something bit her and said "Don't touch me with that". - Heard that one before.
That latest one was the other day I was typing a response to this forum and she walked into the room and asked what I was doing. Told here I was writing on a forum I belonged to and she made some wise comment about "what is it; a porn site"? I scrolled to the top so she couls see the Texas CHL banner and I got the eye roll and a "whatever" as she left the room.
Eventually the eye rolls stop so all I have to worry about is getting the "stink eye"

when I tell her I want to add to my collection and I get the comment "you can only shoot one at a time". I tell her it's always good to have back up.

Re: What the wife thinks?
Posted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 12:47 pm
by AEA
Tell her she can only wear one pair of shoes a a time and check out the STINK EYE you get back from that!

Re: What the wife thinks?
Posted: Tue Jul 21, 2009 12:49 pm
by dewayneward
these are hilarious. I had the exact same conversation with my wife that Ryan had:
When we're 90 years old, I really hope you'll hit me in the back of the head and say "See I told you so, you didn't need to carry that piece of metal around for all of those years, see you didn't need it." I'd rather have that conversion with you than the "I wish I had been carrying when XYZ happened many years ago, I could have prevent ABC from getting hurt
I do hope that she smacks me across the head (trust me, not virgin territory) and says that I wasted all that time and money and nothing ever happened.
She has gotten tired of me sending home articles, etc. Some people just do not want to see that the world has bad people in it. Thankfully we (currently) have the right to arm ourselves.