From the NRA: How to install a Home Security System

[BlackWidow]

1. Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16 work boots.
2. Place them on your front porch, along with several empty beer cans, a copy of Guns & Ammo magazine and several NRA magazines.
3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazines.
4. Leave a note on your door that reads:
'Hey Bubba, Big Jim, Duke and Slim, I went to the gun shop for more
ammunition. Back in an hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls -- they
attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up real bad. I don't think Killer took part in it but it was hard to tell from all the blood.
PS - I locked all four of 'em in the house. Better wait outside.'

[The Annoyed Man]

[Bunkins]

Yup, that would do it

[thankGod]

I never knew that you saw my porch!?

[barres]

Don't forget the last line:

P.P.S. I need more ammo because shooting the Pits with the 12-guage just hacked them off. On second thought, you might want to wait in your trucks.

[scootergeek]

Thats awesome.

[RPBrown]

Sounds like my house.

[Purplehood]

Good idea. Hope the perps can read.