Geek Jokes

[RPB]

There is no place like 127.0.0.1

But you can join 192.168.0.1 and see the world!

I can CMOS it from here.

[The Annoyed Man]

There is no place like 127.0.0.1

But you can join 192.168.0.1 and see the world!

Now those are truly funny.

[Warhammer]

Two engineering students meet on campus one day. The first engineer calls out to the other, "Hey nice bike! Where did you get it?"
"Well," replies the other, "I was walking to class the other day when this pretty, young coed rides up on this bike. She jumps off, takes off all of her clothes, and says, 'You can have anything you want!'"
"Good choice," says the first, "her clothes wouldn't have fit you anyway."

[WildBill]

Schrödinger had two cats, a big fat cat and a small little kitty.
After a while he began to get frustrated and impatient with his
pets. He constantly had to get up to let the cats go outside.
He summoned his assistant and asked him to cut two holes in the
door - A big hole for the large cat and a smaller hole for the kitty.

His assistant was puzzled. "Excuse me Professor Schrödinger, but why
do you want me to make two holes? Obviously the big cat can't go through
the small hole, but the small cat can go through the big hole, too." Schrödinger
thought for a few seconds and answered, "When I say 'Scat Cats', I really mean it!"

[BobCat]

Two atoms were hanging out in the matrix when one started patting himself down, searching his pockets. The other atom asks if he's lost something.

The first atom replies, "Yes, I've lost an electron."

The second atom asks if he is sure.

The first atom replies, "Yes, I'm positive!"

[10Shooter]

There is no place like 127.0.0.1

HA

[terryg]

Schrödinger had two cats, a big fat cat and a small little kitty.
After a while he began to get frustrated and impatient with his
pets. He constantly had to get up to let the cats go outside.
He summoned his assistant and asked him to cut two holes in the
door - A big hole for the large cat and a smaller hole for the kitty.

His assistant was puzzled. "Excuse me Professor Schrödinger, but why
do you want me to make two holes? Obviously the big cat can't go through
the small hole, but the small cat can go through the big hole, too." Schrödinger
thought for a few seconds and answered, "When I say 'Scat Cats', I really mean it!"

Ok WB, I need a little help on this one.

[Excaliber]

I didn't want to continue the errant path of the Vanity Fair Thread, but working for a university (and being a bit geeky myself), I find geek jokes irresistible.

-----

A mathematician, physicist, and engineer are taking a math test. One question asks "Are all odd numbers prime?"

The mathematician thinks, "3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is not prime -- nope, not all odd numbers are prime."

The physicist thinks, " 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is not prime -- that could be experimental error -- 11 is prime, 13 is prime, yes, they're all prime."

The engineer thinks, " 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is prime, 11 is prime, ..."

-----

You left off 2. 2 is prime too.

That would'a been a good point - if the question hadn't been: "Are all odd numbers prime."

[The Annoyed Man]

I didn't want to continue the errant path of the Vanity Fair Thread, but working for a university (and being a bit geeky myself), I find geek jokes irresistible.

-----

A mathematician, physicist, and engineer are taking a math test. One question asks "Are all odd numbers prime?"

The mathematician thinks, "3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is not prime -- nope, not all odd numbers are prime."

The physicist thinks, " 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is not prime -- that could be experimental error -- 11 is prime, 13 is prime, yes, they're all prime."

The engineer thinks, " 3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is prime, 11 is prime, ..."

-----

You left off 2. 2 is prime too.

That would'a been a good point - if the question hadn't been: "Are all odd numbers prime."

You don't think 2 is odd? I find it passingly strange, myself.

[WildBill]

Schrödinger had two cats, a big fat cat and a small little kitty.
After a while he began to get frustrated and impatient with his
pets. He constantly had to get up to let the cats go outside.
He summoned his assistant and asked him to cut two holes in the
door - A big hole for the large cat and a smaller hole for the kitty.

His assistant was puzzled. "Excuse me Professor Schrödinger, but why
do you want me to make two holes? Obviously the big cat can't go through
the small hole, but the small cat can go through the big hole, too." Schrödinger
thought for a few seconds and answered, "When I say 'Scat Cats', I really mean it!"

Ok WB, I need a little help on this one.

Not much to it really. It's just a play on "Schrödinger's Cat Thought Experiment" and an absent-minded professor joke. The guy is a genius physicist but does goofy things that defy common sense.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schr%C3%B6dinger's_cat" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[WildBill]

That would'a been a good point - if the question hadn't been: "Are all odd numbers prime."

You don't think 2 is odd? I find it passingly strange, myself.

Some numbers are very odd, especially the imaginary ones. Some even have bad attitudes - like the negative ones.

[terryg]

To the optimist, the glass is half-full. To the pessimist, the glass is half- empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.

[terryg]

An engineer was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess, and I'll be yours forever." He bent over, picked up the frog, and put it in his pocket.

The frog spoke up again and said, "if you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess,I'll be yours forever".

Again the engineer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket.

Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm actually a beautiful princess and that I'll be yours forever. Why won't you kiss me?"

The engineer said, "Look, I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog, now that's cool!"

[WildBill]

To the optimist, the glass is half-full. To the pessimist, the glass is half- empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.

Or "over designed."

[WildBill]

but a talking frog, now that's cool!"