How to avoid being shot!!

[bauer]

Not really sure if this is meant to be serious or satire. Either way it's a pretty amusing "how to". I want to call it a satire piece but I'm not really sure that a large majority of America would view it that way.

I certainly had a good laugh.

http://www.wikihow.com/Avoid-Being-Shot" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[jmra]

"Remember, these instructions are meant as suggestions, and are not intended to replace common sense"

[chasfm11]

"Most people who are shot die literally from giving up. It helps if you know you've only been shot by a 9mm Parabellum or .45 ACP."

And that knowledge helps me how? The authors really have to have had their tongues in their cheeks or their heads...........


Maybe this is the key:
"Edited by Krystle C., Zack, Commiezilla, Ben Rubenstein and 55 others" (Emphasis mine)

[RoyGBiv]

Here's the video...

[youtube]http://youtube.com/watch?v=SNrnk9pAiBs[/youtube]

[jimlongley]

"Most people who are shot die literally from giving up. It helps if you know you've only been shot by a 9mm Parabellum or .45 ACP."

And that knowledge helps me how? The authors really have to have had their tongues in their cheeks or their heads...........


Maybe this is the key:
"Edited by Krystle C., Zack, Commiezilla, Ben Rubenstein and 55 others" (Emphasis mine)

"only been shot by . . ."

I wonder what they consider to be more lethal.

The article seems to me to be in all seriousness, despite several weaknesses.

[SC1903A3]

GIGN, Mon Dieu

[The Annoyed Man]

"Most people who are shot die literally from giving up. It helps if you know you've only been shot by a 9mm Parabellum or .45 ACP."

And that knowledge helps me how? The authors really have to have had their tongues in their cheeks or their heads...........


Maybe this is the key:
"Edited by Krystle C., Zack, Commiezilla, Ben Rubenstein and 55 others" (Emphasis mine)

Tell that to the tens of thousands of guys shot dead with a .22.

"Most people who are shot die literally from giving up. It helps if you know you've only been shot by a 9mm Parabellum or .45 ACP."

And that knowledge helps me how? The authors really have to have had their tongues in their cheeks or their heads...........


Maybe this is the key:
"Edited by Krystle C., Zack, Commiezilla, Ben Rubenstein and 55 others" (Emphasis mine)

"only been shot by . . ."

I wonder what they consider to be more lethal.

The article seems to me to be in all seriousness, despite several weaknesses.

The truth is that about 80% or so of gunshot victims survive their injuries. I've seen a guy who was shot right through the heart with a 9mm survive his injury. The article is right. . . . .if you give up hope, you may die (it's not guaranteed that you will). OTH, if you get PO'd enough to want to live to kick the other guy's butt later, you'll probably live.

And, a very large percentage of people hit by gunfire take a hit in their extremities, abdomen, or lung fields, so barring a strike to the aorta, vena cava, or femoral artery, people hit in those places will die of a wound infection before the actual gunshot wound kills them. . . . .and dying of a wound infection could take days or weeks. And since hospitals tend to have antibiotics and surgical teams on hand, dying of a wound infection due to perforated bowel is not an immediately pressing concern.

[chasfm11]

TAM,

I think the point here was about knowing that you have been shot by a .45ACP. .22 caliber is said (I did a quick search, couldn't verify) to kill more people every year than any other. I suspect that the reason is that more people are shot by .22 than any other caliber. I understand and agree with your point that many people survive gun shot wounds but those survivals have nothing to do with the understanding by those people of the caliber of gun that shot them.

We certainly have had enough caliber wars on this board and many appear to believe that that the larger the hole, the less likelihood that the person who is shot will survive. The discussion about mouse guns comes up constantly. Of all of the calibers that the authors could have picked as an example, 9 and .45 seem the least likely choices. It still may be open for some to question about whether the article is done satirically or whether those people who contributed to it need a glass navel. It isn't for me.

[bauer]

"Most people who are shot die literally from giving up. It helps if you know you've only been shot by a 9mm Parabellum or .45 ACP."

And that knowledge helps me how? The authors really have to have had their tongues in their cheeks or their heads...........


Maybe this is the key:
"Edited by Krystle C., Zack, Commiezilla, Ben Rubenstein and 55 others" (Emphasis mine)

"only been shot by . . ."

I wonder what they consider to be more lethal.

The article seems to me to be in all seriousness, despite several weaknesses.

Thats what scares me the most.

Number 8 is my favorite "Get the Gun. Knock the gun out of their hands first, then get the gun, as quickly as possible."

It still may be open for some to question about whether the article is done satirically or whether those people who contributed to it need a glass navel. It isn't for me.

The more I've thought about it the more I believe this to be in all seriousness. Satire pieces that are as outlandish as this one 95% of the time come from sources that are known for that type of work (i.e. Onion News Network). This "work" is from a source that never does satire pieces so I honestly think it was meant to be real and "informative".

[The Annoyed Man]

Not really sure if this is meant to be serious or satire. Either way it's a pretty amusing "how to". I want to call it a satire piece but I'm not really sure that a large majority of America would view it that way.

I certainly had a good laugh.

http://www.wikihow.com/Avoid-Being-Shot" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Apparently, this is how it works. . . . . .

First, you're supposed to assume that his 5-shot .38 Special snubby (which is not pointed at you) trumps your 8 round .45 ACP 1911 loaded with silver bullets (and pointed at him) in all respects:


Then, you're supposed to break the grip frame and trigger guard off your gun, drop it, and run:


Then, when you emerge unarmed from behind concrete cover (where you were safe), you're supposed scoop up a lump of coal and show it to the bad guy before hucking it at him:


Then after you have hucked all the coal at the bad guy, he is supposed to take a nap, while you place your foot on his chest and shout "JUdo-o-o-o-o-o CHOP!"


Very instructive.

[bauer]

Then after you have hucked all the coal at the bad guy, he is supposed to take a nap, while you place your foot on his chest and shout "JUdo-o-o-o-o-o CHOP!"
[ Image ]

I lost it right here. Still cleaning coffee off my screen and keyboard.

[LAYGO]

This might be a kid's school project.

[The Annoyed Man]

Then after you have hucked all the coal at the bad guy, he is supposed to take a nap, while you place your foot on his chest and shout "JUdo-o-o-o-o-o CHOP!"
[ Image ]

I lost it right here. Still cleaning coffee off my screen and keyboard.

[VoiceofReason]

Then after you have hucked all the coal at the bad guy, he is supposed to take a nap, while you place your foot on his chest and shout "JUdo-o-o-o-o-o CHOP!"
[ Image ]

I lost it right here. Still cleaning coffee off my screen and keyboard.

At least coffee didn't come out of your nose, or did it? Don't you hate it when that happens?

[jmra]

Then after you have hucked all the coal at the bad guy, he is supposed to take a nap, while you place your foot on his chest and shout "JUdo-o-o-o-o-o CHOP!"
[ Image ]

I lost it right here. Still cleaning coffee off my screen and keyboard.

At least coffee didn't come out of your nose, or did it? Don't you hate it when that happens?

Y'all drink way too much coffee.